Throughout my recovery from chronic migraines it’s fair to say I have learnt a lot, actually a hell of a lot, not through my triumphs, but through my failures. After all, if you don’t try then you won’t fail, and if you don’t fail then you won’t learn, and if you don’t learn then you won’t be able to succeed so I guess it was all part of the journey. That being said, I wanted to share with you a few self-care behaviours that I learnt in the hope that I might be able to prevent you from a little bit of pain along your own journey of healing. Ok, so let’s get stuck in.
1. Put Yourself First
This was a hard lesson and unfortunately one that I only learnt the hard way, in fact so many times I lost count. As a migraine sufferer it is normal to be filled with guilt on a daily basis and many times I would attend a party or gathering with friends when deep down I really knew I shouldn’t. My gut was telling me no but my conscience was telling me to go! I would always worry about what others would think and sure, I have lost a couple of people I thought were friends over the last few years but I am here to tell you that until you prioritise your health first above anything else, your healing won’t be able to begin.
By prioritising number one it reduces your anxiety and eliminates unnecessary stress which only makes migraines so much worse. I lost count of the amount of times I did things for others and suffered for days as a result so try to remember friends to put yourself first, it’s just not worth it. YOU are worth it.
2. Learning That It’s Ok To Say No
Ok, so you’ve listened to your gut (which I have to say is 99.999999% right most of the time) and you have politely turned your friend down for those birthday drinks you wanted to attend, but what I want you to realise is that you are not being selfish by saying no you can’t make it in any way. Real friends will stick around come what may, no matter how many times you cancel on them as they truly only want what’s best for you.
My top tip on how to make this situation more comfortable for both of you is to be honest with them from the start. If deep down you know you probably won’t be able to attend something just explain that to your friend from the start, be honest rather than promising you will be there and 10 minutes before you leave you message saying you can’t make it. The more transparent and open you are about a situation, the more likely they are to understand and don’t worry, there will be plenty more opportunities in the future that you won’t miss out on.
3. Love Yourself Exactly Where You Are
When my migraines were at my worst I’ll be honest, I hated everything about myself. I couldn’t even look at myself in the mirror as I was ashamed of who I had become. That was until I read Louise Hay’s book “You Can Heal Your Life” and everything began to change. She taught me compassion for myself, patience and how to love myself exactly the way I was. Don’t get me wrong, it took me a long time for my mindset to change but when it did I realised how much tension and stress I was creating myself.
She would always ask “What would you say to a friend if they were in your position?”. Of course you wouldn’t put them down and give them a hard time for what they are going through would you? No, you would be empathetic, patient and understanding to the battle that they are fighting so why aren’t you doing the same to yourself? She made a good point. So take a moment today to be kind to yourself and reflect on this notion. And if you are still struggling then get yourself down to a book store and grab a copy of Louise’s Hay’s “You Can Heal Your Life”. It’s magic.
4. Nourish Your Body On All Levels
In order for your body to begin to heal, you need to master self-care in all areas of your life. Everything from making time out for yourself, being disciplined about your social schedule, how much sleep you get, the food you put in your body everyday, whether you talk positively or negatively to yourself or whether you have time to release stress and tension through exercise.
Whatever it is, your body deserves the best and the more you give it what it needs, the more you will be able to thrive again and become migraine free. Essentially, self-care is simply ensuring that you are taking care of your emotional, physical and mental health friends and yes, we are all totally worth it so try checking in with yourself now and again to discover where you could nourish yourself on a deeper level.
I really hope that these self-care behaviours help you find a little more balance in life in order to reduce your migraine frequency. In what ways do you struggle with self-care? Is it balancing family commitments or your busy work schedule? I would love to connect and hear from you. Feel free to leave a comment below.
#LousieHay #SelfCare #SelfLove #Migraines #Healing #Compassion